“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.”

Philippians 4:13

I often think back over the days in my life when it was a constant struggle just to make it to the next day. There were many times when I was unsure whether I even wanted to make it. When I think back over the first three and a half decades of my life, I often refer to them as my survival days.

I call those days my survival days because during those times there was a constant struggle in my inner being. I struggled to know who I really was. I struggled to believe that I had any real value in my life. I struggled with the idea that I was unworthy of anything or anybody. I struggled with the issue of forgiving others and forgiving myself. I struggled with thoughts that no one had ever really loved me just for being me.

I call those days survival days because it appeared that it was always me against the whole world. It was always me with my screwed up thoughts. It was as if I spent my days living in a wilderness, trying to decide which way would lead to a place of freedom and peace. Survival was about always walking a new and different path, always making decisions out of fear, doubt, loneliness, self-pity, sadness, and pain.

I call those days survival because, at any given moment, I had to decide whether I would continue on a journey that offered little promise of a new life or give in to that little voice in my head. It would say, “If you gave up on life, no one would care if you drove your car off the road, over a steep hill, and your pain and sorrow would be over.” I call those days survival because each day I had to find strength to make it through yet another day.

Finding strength would have been too much for me, with the state of mind that I was in those days. The good news is that strength just showed up whenever I needed it. It was there the night that I cried because I was fatherless and needed a father’s comfort. I heard a voice that said, “I am your father.”

Strength was there the night that I needed a reason to live, a reason more powerful than the pain that was in my heart. I heard a voice that said, “Work with my children.” As strange as those words may seem, they were the very words that gave me a reason to keep living. These words let me know that one day everything would make sense and that I had a purpose for my life.

Strength was there to speak firmly to me in the wee hours of one particular morning to say, “No more” to self-defeating behaviors and habits. Strength would always show up when it appeared that I needed it most, through all the pain, struggles, defeats, disappointments, failures, and losses. As I was led by strength out of the wilderness, into a land of promise, a land of provision, happiness, extreme joy, love, and passion—a place of light, abundance, forgiveness, and peace—I have come to realize that strength is still with me.

`The same strength that held my hand, protected my heart, made ways of provision in my time of survival is the same strength that is with me in my time of abundance, creativity, and newness of life. If I was able to endure, with the strength of God, during my days of survival, how much more will I be able to live and prosper by this same strength?

You, too, can do all things through Christ, who strengthens you. You must understand that the same God that gives you strength through hard times in your life is also there to strengthen you during your times of creativity and abundance of life.

    I want to encourage you to know that, yes, you really can live the life of your dreams. Yes, you really can fulfill your life’s purpose. Yes, you really can live a life of abundance, passion, joy, peace, and excitement. With God, all things really are possible. You can do all that you desire through Christ, who strengthens you with love, talents, gift, abilities, and creative power.



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